Blog Archives

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It’s Halloween, which means it’s the season for unpopular opinions: The Ghost in the Shell live action was better than the anime. (Yeah, I said it. COME AT ME, BRO!) I saw GitS way back in 1996, shortly after it was released in the States (remember Blockbuster?), and again Saturday, for this post. My reaction, both […]

“Oh no, Daddy Warpig,” people say to me, “Why are you so mean? Why do you have to tear down things other people love? Why don’t you say something NICE for a change?” Never let it be said that I am loath to answer a fan’s request. So, to brighten the hearts of millions of […]

Everybody’s up in arms about the just-completed seventh season of Game of Thrones. Apparently the producers rushed several plotlines, broke geographic continuity, and committed various other offenses against GoT fandom and THEY MUST PAY. And in between the (mostly correct) raging mobs of rabid fans and the (entirely correct) coldly contemptuous crowds of GoT conscientious […]

People are long-winded. The art of concision has been lost. In its memory, two concise reviews: Two Star Trek shows debuted this month. The Orville is middling alright. Star Trek: Discovery is a stinking toxic fire in a rubber tire disposal facility spewing thick black plumes of noxious smoke that puts 15 people in the […]

When did “fun” become a four-letter word? When did “excitement” become something to sneer at? When did pleasing the audience become despised as the font of all evil? (Don’t answer. I don’t care. That’s not the point.) Entertainment—now follow me here, because the argument gets a little labyrinthine—entertainment is meant to ENTERTAIN. It’s meant to […]

I swear this totally true and not at all made up story happened exactly the way I’m going to tell it. For real. I’m sick, so I calls up the boss. “I’m sick.” “I missed that part where that’s my problem. Also, don’t put this into the blog post, like that camping crap last week. […]

I’m known for my florid, almost purple prose and lengthy, albeit humorous introductions. No time for that today. I’m leaving for the vasty wilderness and a weekend-long Internet blackout, and I have to get this one in the can before I depart for the great unknown. So, please pardon the upcoming abrupt transition. Comics are […]

One of the oddest parts of this decidedly odd job (err, “””job”””) is having people make specific requests for reviews. Not in a “I’d really like to know how good this movie is.” sort of way, more in a “I’d like you to subject your brain to hitherto unknown levels of mental abuse for my […]

Mass Effect: Andromeda is a failure. A massive failure. A failure so large, the company shuttered the “Mass Effect” series entirely and even shut down the studio that made it. You see… It only sold three million copies. Three. Million. Copies. Of a game that costs $60 apiece, and requires a $400+ piece of equipment […]

I throw out groundbreaking new concepts like every day, because that’s the kind of supergenius your humble host is. For today’s bite, let me introduce you to a little concept I came up with last night, called: “The Total Crap Realization Time Lapse” When you were 5, you liked a lot of crap. Crap TV, […]

Let me tell you what’s mystifying about Dragon Age: Inquisition—it’s not a fun game. It’s not an interesting game, not an entertaining game, not an evocative or moving game. It’s a boring game. But it SHOULDN’T be. It has all the hallmarks of a real computer RPG. There’s companion NPC’s holding conversations and arguments while […]

Seems like everyone wants to know what exactly this Pulp Revolution thing exactly is, and how exactly and precisely do we define it, and what stories are or are not included in the specific canon of this very specific bomb throwing literary book club movement thing. In the interests of clarifying nothing, and agitating everyone, […]